The Notebook

The Manly Art Of Shaving - Part 3

Wed, 28 Jul 2010 12:20:42 -0400

We’ll cut to the chase. With a little bump from The Architect I picked up a Merkur razor. It’s German made and reminds me of the things I saw as a kid, with the exception of the blue handle. I also picked up a badger hair brush and a pack of Feather blades, again recommended by The Architect. I may have splurged a bit here but I picked up three tubs of creme. I got Taylor of Old Bond Street, regular and Lavender, and Proraso with a little nudge from Lewis’ blog. After the above I was talking to The Architect and asked him how long a tub of creme lasted him and he replied, “A long time. You only use a very little bit each morning.” Hmm, based on that feedback I’m pretty sure I can last close to a year with the above. Fine. The economics of this is already better for me than with today’s technology. What about the shave though?
Well, I’ll admit the mixing of the lather, after talking to The Architect and spending time in the forums at Badger and Brush, was nicely calming. It reminded me, like all rituals do, a bit of meditation. You are focusing on one thing to the exclusion of all else. Like I had read I worked at this longer than I would have thought necessary. It was rich and creamy by the time I was done. As I had also read I spent more time than I would think necessary putting it on my face.

I had a healthy respect for sliding a bare razor blade across my face. Like I had read, I used little to no pressure letting the weight of the razor do the work. Once North to South, again South to North. Slide my hand across my face and touch up a spot or two and hey, this is a nice shave. Oh, and I didn’t cut myself either. I attribute this more to my having been doing this for thirty years or so which has toughened my skin up nicely, and going easy with the blade. I’m sure a better technique will come with time too.

So yes, this appeals on several levels. I understand the investment in the razor needs to be depreciated over time but spending around fifty cents a blade instead of four dollars is pretty nice. Getting back to basics and not following the technology for questionable improvements at a significant cost is nice too. I will note here the shave I got was as close if not closer than before. Interesting right? I am also a bit enamored of the effects of the creme I have used. The eucalyptus in the Proraso creme was nicely refreshing. The lavender in the Taylor of Old Bond street was also refreshing. The lubrication provided by these cremes also seemed superior to what I have experienced out of a can.

I will end with this thought. The daily ritual of shaving wears thin after a decade or so, in the words of the song, “long after the thrill . . . Is gone.” Anything therefore that can improve on this experience, both in terms of quality, economy, and enjoyment is a very good thing.

The Manly Art Of Shaving - Part 2

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 10:49:02 -0400

So, I have been in this space for some time. It has been a thought on a slow burn waiting for a bit of a breeze, or more to ignite it. A couple of years ago when The Architect came up to visit I noticed he had an old fashioned safety razor and a tub of shaving creme. Curious actually. I never knew it came like that. This stuff was from England and was, well, a creme. For some reason I had this picture in my mind that before the stuff in a can that we all grew up on was a cake of soap that fit in a mug. We didn’t talk much about it but I remember him saying that he was getting much better shaves. I will also note that I like the way The Architect approaches things like this. He always does his homework, and if you ask him he will tell you his rationale and approach. He is an INTP and in my opinion most adept at this sort of thing.

Still, this wasn’t enough to move me to contemplate a switch from my Gillette five blade wonder. Two things pushed me the remaining distance over the edge. The first was Gillette announcing the next generation of blades, still five but thinner and so on. Will this never end? Is technology really improving the shaving experience, and if so are we getting our money worth? The second was stopping by my good friend Lewis’ blog where he mentioned the same subject.

So I did some research of my own and discovered a whole other world out there. This is one of the good things about the internet. All the information in the world is at your fingertips. After conducting my own research I connected back with The Architect and he graciously supplied me with his thoughts. I confess at this point there was a little excitement.

The Manly Art Of Shaving - Part 1

Sat, 24 Jul 2010 20:24:45 -0400

Shaving each morning is one thing that is unique to men. We generally start in our late teens and continue throughout our lives. Now I can only speak from personal experience here, but my dad did not give me any instruction. I may have thought there was little to know. You buy a can of shaving creme and a razor, smear the creme on and shave it off. Simple right? Much has been written on this topic and I’m not going to attempt to provide any additional insight on technique. I’ll just say that like most kids I cut myself to ribbons and it took some time to get comfortable with the whole thing. Years actually.

I started shaving in the early seventies. This was right at the advent of cartridge razors and two bladed razors that gummed up on the first stroke.. I remember looking at safety razors thinking they looked dangerous as hell. Like most starting out I would have said I had sensitive skin. I’m not sure how much was my skin and how much was my technique or lack thereof. I do know though that it took a good ten years before I could engage in this morning ritual and not risk drawing blood or take a bit too much skin off.

I also viewed shaving not as any ritual to be enjoyed, but something to be performed as quickly and efficiently as possible. It was a genuine thrill therefore when Paladin suggested we get a shower mirror from Sharper Image. Shaving in the shower is really a brilliant idea. The steam from the shower softens your beard, which is a necessary prerequisite. Too, as long as you’re in the shower it only takes an extra minute to scrape the last days growth of facial hair and layer of skin off. We still have that mirror in our shower.

Well shaving technology continued to evolve and you women may not be up on this but razor blades are damned expensive. Four dollars for a blade! Now yes, you can use it for a good three weeks, a month if you’re not too picky but buying a four pack sets you back sixteen smack! Even if that’s not a lot of money to you some small part of you has started to think that we have taken this technology too far. Who got a better shave, me with my five blade high tech razor with it’s equally expensive gel, or my grandfather with his Gillette safety razor, badger brush, and a cake of soap?

Perspective

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 14:53:48 -0400

One of the greatest gifts of life, in my humble opinion, is perspective. This comes in part by personal experience and part perhaps anecdotally from stories we hear and read about others. This allows us to judge our experience and rate it on our perception of the scale the rest of humanity falls in. Whatever our childhood experience was growing up, it likely took us some time, well into our adult years, before we had enough perspective to judge where it fell on the curve. Before this it was, “normal.” What you mean all dad’s didn’t beat their children with a belt for getting their good shoes soaked in the rain? I don’t believe you! Yeah, perspective is a wonderful thing.
It allows me to look at my situation with The Chef, who I haven’t seen since April 21st and not feel sorry for myself. I can remind myself that countless others have gone far longer, and if you go back a generation they didn’t have cell phones, text messaging, and email to keep in regular contact. Many of them sent loved ones off not knowing if they would see them again. So yeah, I look at this three months and while I admit it has been hard and I miss her in ways I can’t even express I’m in good company here. This helps me to understand I am not alone. If others can bear up under this load, I surely can too.

I finally got some meaningful feedback on the home inspection this morning. Not hearing anything right away usually means the buyer wasn’t scared away and you lost them. That’s what I’ve been telling myself for the last three days. The list that was communicated has three things on it; paint the house, take care of some mold that was found in the basement, and remove asbestos that is on some of the duct work in the basement.

The house needs painting and I have agreed with myself that if I haven’t locked in a buyer by the end of September I will have it painted anyway. Fine. The mold? Well there is only a little bit by the furnace. Fine, I agree let’s take care of it. The asbestos? Yes, let’s do that too, though I’ve been told if you don’t touch it, it causes no problems, it’s only when you’re removing it that you need to worry. Nothing on this list is anything I can’t agree to. Oh, the buyer mentioned something about worrying about water coming into the basement still. Everyone has told her though that the work that has been done will eliminate this problem. So again, none of this is a problem.

Then why am I feeling deflated, like I just may be spending the winter here in the garden state? In part because I have no perspective when it comes to selling a house. This is my first time. I suspect this kind of thing is normal, especially in a buyers market. If I were buying a house I would push hard too. I don’t know this though because I have no perspective. Maybe this is a prelude to the whole thing falling through.
The real answer here, in terms of what the buyer will do comes in two parts. The first is the inspectors report which has been promised for today or tomorrow. That will list everything he has found. The second and most important piece here will be communicated in a letter from the buyers attorney to my attorney. That will likely come next week, perhaps as early as Monday. Then we know what were dealing with. I can’t imagine anything that I wouldn’t be okay dealing with. I’ve already fixed all the big ticket items. The other option of course is the buyers agent calling my agent and saying the deal’s off. Let’s hope that doesn’t happen right?

I want to stress too that my real estate agent has been very cool throughout this whole process. This is because he has perspective. He has been selling houses for several decades. Nothing phases him. He presents each situation to me clearly, lays out the options, and makes a suggestion as to the best course. He’s one of the reasons I’m okay with this whole process. Having someone with you that has been around the block a few times lends perspective.

If I can find something good here though, other than we still in fact have a potential buyer, it is this. I am okay with what ever happens.

“Road Trip”

Thu, 22 Jul 2010 21:13:03 -0400

When the house does finally sell, depending on the time of year, I’m thinking about driving out to Utah via back roads. Now this would of course mean that I’m not at the wheel of a U-Haul truck. If I am driving all our possessions out you can be sure I will take the most direct route possible. If it’s just me and my car though, yeah, I’m going to see America. I can’t imagine driving across country too many more times in my life so why not take my time and do it right? It’s not like I’m on a schedule here either.

Now there are a couple of ways I could do this. I could make sure my route takes me through the remaining lower forty eight that I have yet to visit; Oklahoma, Kansas, South Dakota, North Dakota, and Montana. I have to be honest with you though, that does not sound at all fun.
If I took a southern route there are things I could do. I could stop by The Architects place in Virginia. I could stop by Bergsteiger’s place in Savannah, If I was truly adventurous I could swing down and see a friend in Boca and then continue on to the Key’s because why not?

Traveling along the coast clear till Texas has more than a little appeal to me, even with the BP disaster in the gulf. Now I wouldn’t be too keen on going through West Texas because I’ve flown over it in a private plane and it looks boring as hell. New Mexico and Arizona would be very doable though. Yeah this has appeal to me.

Bergsteiger has told me the Northern route is nice. I’m not sure how he knows that, but he must have some experience. I actually would like going to Montana, and it’s probably the desire to drive through the mountains in the western portion of the state but other than that? Shrug. I’m not quite feeling it. On the other hand though, I could go up into Canada and drive the Gasp Bay Peninsula and then head West on the Trans-Canada Highway. Tell me that doesn’t sound cool as hell. No. You can’t.

Then again this may all be a pipe dream. The expense of the gas and hotel and food could easily get out of hand. Maybe I’ll work up some estimates to see what it really looks like. This would entail the good type of planning too, routes, distance travelled each day, that sort of thing.

Probably the greatest appeal here would be the opportunity to document the journey. The pictures, the people I would meet, the food, the blogging and journaling. Yeah, that strikes me as a once in a lifetime kind of thing.

Who’s with me?

“Master Yoda, I’m Not Afraid.”

Tue, 20 Jul 2010 17:30:00 -0400

I’m in this state of limbo that makes many things nigh unto impossible forcing me to live in this stasis where I have a limited number of choices, so when I actually get a potential buyer that makes an offer, takes it to contract, past attorney review, and on to inspection, well it’s something to think about. The inspection is tomorrow and I look towards it knowing that if we get past it everything changes and if we don’t I stay in limbo. Truthfully, I think I would be more anxious, but no.

I am calm. This is what the last year has done to me. I had a job interview at Starbucks today (this is my backup plan in case this buyer bolts, and the UI doesn’t pass) and was asked that question, “What have you learned in the last year.” I answered with no hesitation, patience and kindness. Life will do to me what it will and all my worrying and scheming will make no difference. I have learned to embrace life, each beautiful, each painful, each ugly moment, and trust me here this last year has given me an ample amount of all. So I look at this impending crossroads that is quickly coming up with little emotion. It occurs to me too that all the study and practice of Tao and Zen have served to help me reach this point. This is one of those instances, for me, of life can only be understood by looking backwards but must be lived looking forward.

I was talking to Web Master and as is typical with he and I we found ourself in the same space. I told him life no longer scares me. I think I can meet whatever comes now and not blink. Maybe that makes me naive, maybe I’m a fool, both likely. Part of me isn’t sure if this is good or not, but it is where I’m at, and as I have said I embrace it. The truth is it feels like real freedom. It feels like I’ve paid the price for this one.

While I’ve been wading through all this adversity The Chef is living in our future. It reminds me of another quotation I came across a while ago, “The future has already arrived, it’s just not evenly distributed yet.” That is most true with The Chef and I.

Nothing To It

Fri, 16 Jul 2010 17:09:57 -0400

“When will the house actually be understood to be sold?”

“When we all, including the mortgage company, have agreed on a closing date.”

“Thank you.” Here is what has to happen to reach that state. To the best of my understanding there are three key steps all of which must be successfully completed. This assumes as a given that you have agreed on a price with your buyer and signed the contracts.

Attorney review must be completed. In my opinion this is little more than a formality. The buyer’s attorney sends a list of requests to the sellers attorney. Much of this is boilerplate but some is not. It includes things like if there is an oil tank on the property and I as the seller am aware of it I have to disclose it. If there is a fire in the house that destroys more than ten percent of the value of the house the seller can back out no questions asked. If you read one of these over you generally nod your head and go yeah, sure, I can agree to this. I suppose it keeps every one honest and it gives lawyers an excuse to bill eight hundred dollars or so. Both sides have to agree to this list.

Home inspection must be completed. If you have an older home this is a big deal. The reason is old homes are easy targets for finding things that are wrong. My real estate agent calmly told me at the start of this, “Don’t worry, they are going to find a lot of things wrong and we aren’t going to fix any of them. They are buying the house as is.” Yeah. Fine. Unless the inspector looks at your back yard and exclaims, “OMG!” and then continues with how bad bad bad this is. Then you lose your buyer even though you calmly tell him to relax we will fix the problem. It costs you just over eleven thousand dollars to do so, but by the time you’re done, yeah, it looks nice. Why couldn’t the buyer that bolted visualize this like you could?

The second time you get to this point, you have a Zen like calm about you. “I am one with the pain that is my life,” you whisper to yourself. “If this buyer gets skittish and bolts, we’ll fix whatever turned up and wait for another buyer.” These aren’t just words either. The calm goes deep, even though you know if you pass this hurdle you are likely one who sold their house. All that time living alone comes to an end if you pass. If not, you remain in this hell with no end date to look forward to. It is what it is. Either way you are prepared. Such calm only comes to those who have been around the block a time or two.

The appraisal must be completed and your house be priced at our below the appraised value. If you set your price right this should not be a problem. In a down economy with real estate prices plummeting this is nothing to brush aside. If you’re too high the buyer can walk away no questions asked. You also have the opportunity to renegotiate the deal, agree on a lower price that is within the appraised amount.

Then you can get a closing date. That is your target, not to be missed, by which you will have cleaned out your life and sanitized that abode you called home for all those years and walk away from it, likely never to look upon it again. Is it any wonder moving is one of the five most stressful things a person can do?

Damned Fine Deck Ridge Walker

Thu, 15 Jul 2010 16:33:07 -0400

It is no secret I have had other things on my mind than writing for here. Finally though, here is a bit of good news. The deck was finished today. You’re looking at a photo I took as soon as the men packed up and left. It measures twelve by sixteen feet, big enough to have the family and a friend or two for a barbecue. As I am moving I opted for pressure treated wood and not the fancy composite stuff that costs twice as much. Who ever buys the house will be very happy with this deck and likely won’t know the difference. The price? Yeah, I’m going to share it with you. It priced out at just over five large. That was before replacing the threshold at the back door that had rotted a bit. Pricey huh? I agree.

If I were staying here I would let the deck sit until early September at which point I would wash it down and give it its first coat of stain. I would do the same thing in the springtime next year and every year there after. Part of me is sad to have a nice deck and know I will not be the one to enjoy it. Another part of me thinks it will be a small price to pay for being together again with The Chef, playing golf every week with Paladin, and hanging with The Destructor and Little Page.

I could dig out the before pictures but I’m not going to. I’ll just say that it was significantly worse than what you’re looking at above. Imagine though, a poured concrete patio that looked nice in 1950 when the house was built and slowly deteriorated in the intervening 60 years. Add to that the entire back yard focused all the water coming off the Watchung Mountain behind us to the house. I wish to God I could have scraped the necessary money, twelve large in todays dollars, together back in 1985 and done this. Life is messy that way. You can rarely do what you would like, and instead are forced to make an endless series of compromises. The back yard or food and clothes.

Anyhow, if you’re in the neighborhood stop in and you and I can go sit on the back deck and enjoy the beverage of your choice while we renew our acquaintance. You best make it soon though because before you know it I’m going to have to move out.

It’s Called A Swale

Tue, 22 Jun 2010 16:33:30 -0400

Yeah, this may not look like much to you but I find it thrilling beyond words. You are looking at a swale, “A low or hollow space between two ridges.” The water will now run down my back yard hit that ridge you see in the picture above that is now firmly in place blocking the path to my basement and follow its new course across the back of my house onto the side where it will neatly run down to the street. The far side of the house, just past that AC unit you see in the picture has had a new drain pipe put in, in the ground and dirt pushed up so that the ground now slopes away from the house on that side. Thrilling. Absolutely thrilling.

The plywood you see is covering the holes for the footings for my new deck that goes in next week.

Guy Stuff

Mon, 21 Jun 2010 16:41:23 -0400

Yeah. That’s the patio pulled away from the house. It took them all of twenty minutes to have it broken in pieces and stacked up away from the house. Now for perspective, it took Bergsteiger and I a good three hours to barely put a dent in the thing would our strong backs and sledge hammers. No, watching these guys reminds me that having the right tool for the job is a beautiful thing. In this case the right tool was a Komodo Back hoe. This was guy stuff of the highest caliber. I left around 2:30 this afternoon and already the back yard was starting to slope nicely away from the house. Can I tell you how thrilling this is for me. It is far beyond my ability to express. Now when the rains come they will not run right to my back wall and into my basement. No they will run to the sides of my house and down to the street. I’m so happy I think I’m going to faint.

On my way to Starbucks Gillette I called deck guy. My “reason” was to get his opinion on raising the outside electrical outlet by a foot or so to give room for the deck to go in. He liked that idea so I called my electrician and he’s now scheduled to come out tomorrow. The real reason I called was to see if he applied for the building permit for my deck. You know what? He did! Can I tell you how thrilling that is for me! A construction guy that does what he says! The permit takes seven days so mid next week he plans on being out and starting construction. Yeah. The house will then be in better shape than it has ever been.

The back yard has been an eyesore. Hell, we lost one buyer because of it. Now when somebody walks out back instead of saying, “Oh my God!” They will say, “Oh my God!” Well, okay it may not be that nice but I bet they will think, “Hey nice deck.” Just to treat myself and spend more money I don’t have I plan on going to Home Depot once the deck is in and buying some staging furniture. You know what I’m talking about right? An outdoor table and four chairs, just to help prospective buyers visualize how nice it will be to have an evening meal or party out on the deck. Yeah, I suppose I can get some use out of it too sipping on my morning tea and maybe taking a meal out there when it’s not one of those hellishly hot New Jersey summer days.

This is the fun part, seeing this come together. I’d say I will hate to leave this place after it’s all whipped into shape but that would be a lie. Yes, it will be nice, but may God smite me dead if I ever buy an old house again. Besides that, I miss The Chef.